My Notes
I sit here two years down the line, a different person. Someone that has grieved, that has healed, that has fallen out of love for her first ever crush. But one weekend, one moment, one shift as I looked at him in one of the most spiritual places. And I realize that I am still grieving. I grieve the relationship I had with his parents. I miss the future that I thought we would have. I miss the wedding I imagined we would have. I miss our future kids that I will never get to meet. I miss the person I once had even though I know he grew into someone different.
-Part of a larger story
I was a blooming flower that needed nutrients, that needed water, that needed him to let me grow. But instead I was slowly wilting away, the spark in my eyes fading. It took leaving the person I loved in order to grow, to give my own self nutrients, to give my own self water. And now that I grew into this flower, I want him to see all of the growth that happened. But he won’t because I needed to be without him for this flower to grow.